Win Win | July 4th

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July 4th

by Win Win

Win Win is an American rock & roll band that takes aim at a variety of hard-hitting and important topics such as, a pot-smoking Bigfoot who steals your BBQ, fireworks safety and the right to blow your hand off, aliens and emo werewolves.
Genre: Rock: Rock & Roll
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1. July 4th
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ABOUT THIS ALBUM


Album Notes
Win Win. Finally, American rock & roll that actually takes aim at a variety of hard-hitting and important subject matters, such as spotting a pot-smoking kleptomaniac Bigfoot who steals your BBQ and your uncle’s moonshine. Or finding an old record player in the garbage and discovering there’s a gram of hash hiding inside. Want to blow your hand off with fireworks on July 4th? We applaud your freedom to do so (even if YOU can’t, now that you only have one hand). We also address the important emergency information you need when the aliens come to take over the planet, like setting your raygun to stun. More importantly, we offer tips for when you’re confronted by a man-bun-wearing werewolf who thinks he’s Morrissey.

These songs have been cryogenically preserved, waiting for the right time to be unearthed. And that time is now.

Why?

The exact date is sketchy, but some “music experts” think it all happened sometime around 1983. By all reports, it started on a starry summer night, when a white cloud-like mist perfectly resembling the shape of Marc Bolan appeared. This apparition was said to have formed at the exact same time at the bedsides of each prominent member of the musical group(s) The Ramones, Cheap Trick, The Dead Kennedys, The Jam and Crazy Horse.

From town to town and across the pond this lion-maned ghost woke them from their slumber (or from whatever state of mind they were in), and since it was MARC FUCKING BOLAN, he had their full attention. As their mouths were all agape with awe, Bolan opened his own mouth, and in his familiar warbled posh accent, he spoke: “i have come here tonight my lovely friends, to let you know that you must all join forces post-haste. The gathering will take place at The Ponderosa steakhouse in Roswell, New Mexico for a meeting of the minds.”

The sole reply came from the great Joey Ramone, and he said it all.: “You just don’t say no when Marc Bolan floats over your bed in your sleep and tells you to book a flight to Roswell for a smorgasbord.”

And so it was, it was there in the Nevada desert where they all met. Nothing out of the ordinary for Roswell at the time, really. Inside the Ponderosa, just a bunch of colorful looking people diving into the salad bar before going out to search for UFOs. And boy did they take advantage of that salad bar. All you could eat. No sneeze guard back then.

It only took about 15 minutes. Each and every one of those artists at the gathering on that fateful day all got the worst food poisoning any of them ever experienced. All of them were writhing and sweating together - some making it to the Ponderosa restroom, some not. All these great musicians and nothing but a chorus of groans and whimpers. But it was then... just when they thought the cramps, fever and straight-up burning nightmare would never end...

...The Marc Bolan godlike-mist appeared once more. He spoke “yes, yes, yes, my beautiful people. Don’t you see, I’ve have gathered each of you here for one reason. To create together. If you want this sickness to stop, you must collaborate. The songs will come together and you will start to feel better. The pain will go away. Don’t you see my little lambs, it is simply a win-win?”

So immediately, although in a weakened state, looking and feeling like ghosts themselves, they got to work. The songs came easy. One could say it was raining songs from the sky. Legend has it that they hammered it out in a day. Once it was complete, as promised by the Bolan haunting, their fever and sickness lifted.

Early in morning they finished the last tune. Battered and anemic, the group had a vote and decided that since no one would ever believe their story, especially since they themselves weren’t exactly sure what just happened, they would bury the demo tapes in the desert near the Ponderosa.

They all went their separate ways and never spoke of it again. No one knows what happened to those songs... until now. John, Dave and Matt were just driving by when for no reason, their car skidded to a stop off the road, near the now abandoned Ponderosa. They noticed an odd reflection in the dirt in front of the car, and found a small labyrinth made of rocks, old guitar picks and a lot of cigarette butts. They dug in and unearthed these songs, and brought them to light, just for you.

This is their interpretation of these songs. This is what they found.

It’s a Win Win.

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